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Not All Heroes Wear Capes - Billy the Cornish Rex: River Swimmer and Restaurant Bandit!

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Written by: Op-Ed Shaydee Lane

We All Need a Billy

Not all heroes wear capes. Some are tiny, grey, and insist on swimming in rivers  -  while being very naughty in restaurants.

In 1984, a tiny grey kitten named Billy adopted our family - and changed everything.

These days, it sometimes feels like the world could do with a few more stories like his. So I’ll take a little trip down memory lane, reminding myself - and perhaps you - of happier, gentler times.

Before Billy, we had known the quiet grace of a white Cornish Rex named Tripitaka - Tripi to us. With his great ears and gentle presence, he reminded us of the monk from the old Japanese television series Monkey. Calm, wise, and kind, Tripi was, in every sense, a small white god in our home.

And then he was gone.

My daughters were heartbroken. They sobbed and cried, and even now, all these years later, they remember that day—the day love left the room and took something with it.

As a parent, I could not bear their pain. 

Enter Billy... 

Read more: Not All Heroes Wear Capes - Billy the Cornish Rex: River Swimmer and Restaurant Bandit!

Arrest of Wallaby Hero! Trevor led off in handcuffs!

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Written by: Op-Ed Ratty News

Dusty Gulch Dispatch: Arrest of Wallaby Hero

A wallaby is arrested. A hero is questioned. A weasel chooses the wrong side. And Dusty Gulch remembers too late who actually climbed the tower.

By Roderick (Whiskers) McNibble, Investigative Observer of Chaos
(and occasional unwilling participant in pastry warfare)

Dusty Gulch rarely appears on maps. It sits beyond the last sensible turnoff, where reality blurs, logic quietly resigns with a dramatic sigh, and even the flies have formed a union demanding better working conditions and a seat on the foreign affairs committee.

Today, the Dusty Dingo Pub was not just a bar -  it was the theatre of pure, unfiltered, gravy-soaked Australian drama.

From the corner, Dennis the Hat watched it all unfold, hat low, pint untouched -  the sort of man who didn’t say much, but usually said the thing everyone else wished they’d noticed sooner.

Trevor the Wallaby -  hero and still-decorated rescuer of Mayor Dusty McFookit (see: The Water Tower Incident, still damp in living memory and trotted out whenever someone whinges about “heights” or “leadership”)  -  now stood accused of the heinous crime of “killing honklanders.”

Yes.

Those honklanders. The smiling, note-taking visitors the government have backed so enthusiastically.

Read more: Arrest of Wallaby Hero! Trevor led off in handcuffs!

The Quiet Blokes Behind the Courage

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Written by: Op-Ed Shaydee Lane

When I was a little girl, my grandmother gave me a book -  a collection of poems by C. J. Dennis.

I treasured it then, and I still do.

Even as a child I could understand his words. There was a delightful honesty in them - a plain-speaking larrikin voice that felt like it belonged to the ordinary Australian bloke.

That same voice stayed with me into adulthood.

Dennis wrote during and after the Great War, not as a soldier at the front, but as someone who listened closely to the diggers and their families - and gave them a voice. He captured the spirit of the men who stepped up, not with grand speeches, but with the simple humour and quiet steadiness that came to define the Australian soldier.

Read more: The Quiet Blokes Behind the Courage

What Do We Think a Soldier Is?

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Written by: Op-Ed Monty

Are we still raising men willing to stand?

As the 25th of April draws near, we find ourselves once again edging toward ANZAC Day - that quiet moment in the year when our nation stops, bows its head, and remembers what it once asked of its young men… and what those men gave back.

But this year feels different.

Not quieter. Not calmer.

Because right as we prepare to honour courage, there’s a question hanging in the air that too few seem keen to answer straight:

What do we actually think a soldier is?

The arrest this week of Ben Roberts-Smith has brought that question crashing through the front door.

Read more: What Do We Think a Soldier Is?

Utopia or Dystopia? How 1960s Mouse Utopias Led to Grim Predictions for Future of Humanity.

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Written by: George Christensen

John B. Calhoun’s “rat utopia” experiments of the 1960s, designed to be paradises with unlimited resources, resulted in societal collapse and extinction due to extreme behavioural changes, showcasing a dark side of population density and social roles.


The initial population explosion and flourishing of the rat colonies in these utopias turned into a nightmare as they approached their physical and social limits, leading to a breakdown of social structures, deviant behavior, and eventual demographic collapse.


The experiments serve as a chilling parallel to the trajectory of Western society, where periods of abundance and growth gave way to economic shocks, social stagnation, and a rise in antisocial behaviors, suggesting we are experiencing our own form of “behavioral sink.”


Current societal trends, including the breakdown of traditional roles, rising deviancy, and a loneliness crisis, mirror the decay observed in Calhoun’s rat populations, indicating that Western civilisation might be nearing its own “point of no return.”


Humanity possesses the unique ability to recognise its dire straits and has the power to reverse the downward spiral, preventing us from meeting the same fate as the “rat utopias.”

Read more: Utopia or Dystopia? How 1960s Mouse Utopias Led to Grim Predictions for Future of Humanity.

“Stone by Stone: The Long Road Back to the Light

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Written by: Op-Ed Shaydee Lane

When life collapses and the weight of grief threatens to bury us, we have two choices: wait in the dark, or begin, stone by stone, to build our way back toward the light.

Joseph Cheval, a humble French postman, chose to build. Out of sorrow, he created a palace -  not for kings, but for love, for memory, and for hope.

His story reminds us that resurrection is not always sudden. Sometimes, it is a long, aching labour… one we must undertake ourselves if we are to roll back the stone and rise again.

At Easter, we often turn to ancient texts and sacred traditions. Yet sometimes the message reaches us just as powerfully through the quiet lives of ordinary people -  stories that slip past doctrine and speak directly to the soul.

One such story is that of Joseph Ferdinand Cheval, a French postman from a small village. He wasn’t a priest or a prophet, nor a philosopher. He simply walked his mail route each day, delivering letters across the countryside.

And yet, through quiet persistence and grief-transformed imagination, he built something that still speaks to the heart of Easter.

Cheval’s story doesn’t begin with triumph, but with a stumble.

Literally.

Read more: “Stone by Stone: The Long Road Back to the Light

How Governments Overthrew Their Own People Through Stealth and Fear - The Silent Coup

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Written by: Op-Ed Monty

They didn’t need guns, tanks, or barricades. The revolution came silently.... through legislation, compliance, and fear.

While the people slept, their governments seized power by stealth.

Under the guise of safety and security, they rewrote the rules, turning citizens into subjects.

Now, with digital IDs, speech regulations, and financial controls tightening the noose, many still don’t see it. And now an oil "crisis".

The coup is complete - and most never even knew it happened. This is a Revolution in Reverse..... overthrow of the people by the government....

Read more: How Governments Overthrew Their Own People Through Stealth and Fear - The Silent Coup

Mrs McFookit’s Away… And the Smoke Alarm Is Already Nervous

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Written by: Op-Ed Ratty News

The Bachelor Fortnight: Survival Tips for the Suddenly Unsupervised Male
By Roderick (Whiskers) McNibble, Domestic Affairs Correspondent

Dusty Gulch awoke this week to a development that has sent a quiet but unmistakable ripple of concern through the township:

Men… left home alone.

With Mrs McFookit now airborne on her lamington reconnaissance mission, one local resident -  Mayor Dusty McFookit – has unwittingly become the case study for what experts are calling “Acute Domestic Independence Syndrome.”

History, however, offers us guidance.

One need only look to " Home Alone,"  in which young Kevin McCallister demonstrated both the potential and the perils of unsupervised living.

While Kevin successfully defended his home from burglars, it must be noted that his diet consisted largely of ice cream, junk food, and questionable life choices -  a path many in Dusty Gulch appear alarmingly eager to replicate.

With that in mind, The Gazette offers the following practical survival tips:

Read more: Mrs McFookit’s Away… And the Smoke Alarm Is Already Nervous

The Barabbas Interview – A Good Friday Reflection (2026)

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Written by: Op-Ed Ratty News

The Ratty News Exclusive: The Barabbas Interview – Good Friday 2026

Two thousand years on, the choice remains - and so does the grace

By Roderick (Whiskers) McNibble, Investigative Reporter Extraordinaire
The Ratty News Foreign Desk | Special Report

It is once again the anniversary of Christ’s crucifixion, and I, Roderick McNibble - known to my loyal readers as Whiskers - found myself in a place even dustier and more desperate than last year. This is not a story to play with lightly.

On this most solemn of Fridays, how could a rat from Dusty Gulch ignore the weight of it all?

I touched down in an undisclosed city after a ten-minute flight that bent the laws of time, space, sobriety, and probably a few international treaties. Ratty Airways’ signature orange biplane - fitted with dynamic whisker propulsion (an innovation I may or may not have invented after four Marmalade Brandies courtesy of the Dusty Gulch Country Women’s Association Brewing and Distilling Company) - performed admirably.

The high wind helped. The rationed fuel did not. Fortunately, Whiskers Dynamic Propulsion (WDP) kicked in, and I flew over the Strait of Hormuz within seconds, avoiding radar and potential trouble.

Read more: The Barabbas Interview – A Good Friday Reflection (2026)

From Orson Wells to HG Wells : The War of the Words or War of the Words?

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Written by: Op-Ed Monty

On a chilly October night in 1938, millions of Americans huddled around their radios, unaware they were about to become part of history. As Orson Welles' War of the Worlds broadcast unfolded, many listeners believed they were hearing real news of an alien invasion.

The panic that followed revealed the power of mass media to shape perception - a power that, decades later, has only grown more insidious. Today, the tools of deception have evolved. The radio has been replaced by smartphones, social media, and 24-hour news cycles, but the effect is the same: confusion, fear, and a population increasingly unsure of what to believe.

Read more: From Orson Wells to HG Wells : The War of the Words or War of the Words?

A Day for Fools, Fun, and Folly

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Written by: Op-Ed Monty

The exact origins of April Fools’ Day remain unclear, but historians have traced it back to several possible sources, blending historical events, cultural customs, and folklore. 

Yet it seems like April Fools’ Day has become a year-round event in the real world. The line between satire and reality is so blurred that people fall for the most ridiculous things. I mean, when you have AI-generated celebrities endorsing fake products, deepfake politicians making speeches, and media outlets pushing absurd narratives with a straight face, it’s no wonder people are struggling to tell fact from fiction.

It feels like common sense has gone on holiday and left no forwarding address. No need for spaghetti trees or gumboot-wearing turkeys anymore .... just flash a clickbait headline and people will gobble it up. 

Gullibility seems to be increasing, but it has been around for a long time. ........

Read more: A Day for Fools, Fun, and Folly

  1. From Trike to Tail-Wags: Frankie’s World
  2. From Ned Kelly to Dezi Freeman: What Happens When a Nation Stops Trusting Itself
  3. She Rode Alone: The Legend of Red Jack
  4. The Day I Chose the Dog Over the Deal

Page 13 of 272

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“Loyalty to country ALWAYS. Loyalty to government, when it deserves it.” 
― Mark Twain