Patriot Realm

During PP's excursions into croc country many years ago, there came a day, when I was asked to take the new IT officer with me as an introduction to the Cape communities, the IT bloke was fresh out of James Cook University, and a nervous type, not often away from home.

Now, to those of you not familiar with the Cape, I am talking about Cape York, up the pointy end of  Australia where the only thing bigger than the sharks are the crocodiles. And maybe the mosquitoes. And the snakes. And the spiders. You get the picture.  

Anyway, prior to the trip, which was to Lockhart River, I was "officially" invited by locals to go fishing for a day there.

All well and good, got the necessary approvals done, and off we two went, flying with Skytrans to Lockhart River, the young IT bloke wasn't all that fussed flying there,as it was monsoon time, so the flight was rough. Monsoon time up there is wet, humid and tough and rain comes down like the Niagra Falls.

The young IT bloke had never been in a boat or been fishing before. And so began today's yarn about a day fishing and how Jaws met the Titanic.........

The Wednesday arrived for our fishing trip, and with local encouragement, we went out with a bloke who said he was very experienced in boats, so all good.

We motored to the Lockhart River mouth south of the Lockhart River community, and dropped our lines.

All going pretty well so far.

Then, PP hooks a biggun, it pulled like buggery, and was moving the boat around, so a bloody big one on the hook.

Now this boat was a centre console, about 16 feet in length.

So, PP played the monster for half an hour or so, slowly, slowly, working it to the surface, (I was using 45lb breaking strain line), then the shape began to appear of the monster, and the closer to the surface it came, the bigger it got, so big in fact, it was wider and longer, than the boat we three blokes were in.

It was a bloody huge shark, probably the one that was eating the crocs there. 

The young new employee, the IT bloke, near shit himself, the Captain of the boat was yelling at me  " Cut the line! " 

I yelled back " Take a bloody photo of it first! " 

In the melee, the Captain says  " We don't have a camera, cut the bloody line! " 

Well I don't know, what a bloody carry on, anyway, to settle the panic, I gave the line a hard tug, and broke it.

After all had calmed down, we resumed fishing, then bugger me, I was pulling in newly born sharks, about 2 foot long, once after the other, I caught over half a dozen, and said, "This is a waste of time here, we should move to another possie." [position]

So, we moved further along the river and kept fishing, bloody nothing biting, then to top it off, a bloody big monsoonal storm suddenly blew up to the immediate north of us.

The wind was picking up, as were the waves in the river, so it was time to head back to Lockhart River, pronto.

So here the three of us are, out in the sea heading towards the Lockhart River barge ramp, a couple of miles away to the north, the waves were getting quite big, it was pissing down heavy rain, lightning cracking around us, and to make it even more memorable, the boat began to sink because of the big waves breaking over the boat.

This video was dramatised footage from the young IT bloke's memories of that day. Viewer discretion is advised. He sold the rights to his story to Hollywood and it became one of the most popular movies ever made. The young IT bloke now lives in a house in California with 3 naked Thai ladies and eats porridge for breakfast to keep his strength up. 

The young IT bloke went white, the Captain was busy keeping the boat going forward through the big waves.

I yelled to young IT bloke " Use the bloody bucket and bail like crazy" My head swung around to the Captain, " don't you have a bilge pump? " I yelled through the downpour. 

The Captain called back " Yeah, it should be working! "

Well, it wasn't.

Meanwhile, the top edge of the boat, was only inches above the sea, the arse of the boat was tilting like the Titanic due to the boat under full power, driving the water down to the stern.

Oh the joy of it all.

Throughout the ordeal, PP kept a clear head. As you know, I am used to dealing with situations like this.

I called  out " The bilge pump must be blocked up, I'll clear it! "

So PP set about accessing the bilge pump, the young IT bloke was bailing like his life depended on it (it actually did, LOL) and his face was whiter than any white man ever seen, while PP got at the bilge pump to find the intake was clogged with leaves and debris.

Meanwhile the wind was howling, the rain was pelting down, the lightning strikes were so close, you could hear them sizzling through the air before the big crash of thunder, and to make the day even more memorable, the waves were becoming higher.

So, PP succeeded in clearing the bilge pump, and soon the boat began to level out to an extent as it was still under full power, racing towards the barge ramp ahead somewhere, as we could not see that far due to the darkness caused by the storm and the heavy rain pissing down.

Eventually, there was the boat ramp not far ahead, the bilge pump was still working hard, young IT bloke was still white as a freshly washed white sheet using Persil, the Captain was focused on the boat ramp.

 Today's post is brought to you by Persil..... Now back to our scheduled programme.... 

It looked like we were going to make it at last.

And, we did, we made it, got the boat on the boat trailer in the rain pissing down, and back to the community while the storm kept raging.

When the Captain dropped us off at our digs and young IT bloke and PP went inside for a cuppa, I was shocked, to hear, the young IT bloke state, he will never ever, go fishing ever again ever, in his entire life. By then, there was some colour back in his face.

So back to Cairns we flew on Friday afternoon, young IT bloke vowing never to return, PP thinking about those cold beers in the fridge, and life went on.

It's the Aussie way.